Forgive us for the ways we have wronged you, just as we also forgive those who have wronged us. – Matthew 6:12
Father Henri Nouwen wrote, “Forgiveness is the name of love practiced among people who love poorly. The hard truth is that all people love poorly.” (From his You Are the Beloved)
How do we love poorly?
How would you answer that?
Some suggestions:
- Using others for selfish purposes
- Refusing to admit our mistakes while blaming others
- Refusing to empathize and give others benefit of the doubt
- Holding grudges instead of letting them go
- Enforcing the letter of the law blindly and coldly
- Stereotyping, labeling, judging
- Using resources today without regard for future generations
- Letting privilege dictate justice
- Being quicker to express anger than understanding
- Prioritizing religion as “me and Jesus” instead of serving “the least of these”
Which would you add? (feel free to comment)
I came up with this list fairly quickly. That’s because I’m personally well acquainted with loving poorly. Yes, as Henri said, “all people love poorly.”
Jesus, the great physician, knew the medicine for the disease of poorly-loving. We pray it every time in the Lord’s Prayer.
“Forgive” comes from a Latin word meaning, “to give completely, without reservation.”
Forgive means giving empathy; respect; peace; dignity; a second chance.
We who poorly love do so because we take and protect instead of give and invite. It’s such a hard, ingrained habit to break. Maybe that’s why we had to receive the Holy Spirit to take Jesus’ words, put them into our hearts, and help us live them.
May God empower us to love as Jesus loves, knowing that in giving we see a different, deeper, richer side of life.
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New Book of the Month Selection
Imagining new ways of being kind to others is a great new year’s resolution. The book, The Rabbit Effect, can help. Here’s more info.
Thank you, Greg.
Kathy
Praise God that when we accept the gift of His Son’s atonement for our sins, we are born again. We become new creatures in Him, and the Holy Spirit within us allows us to love as He loved. We are still flawed people, and this treasure of the Gospel is contained in ‘earthen vessels,’ but we are capable of a Divine love that excels all others. Thanks be to God!
I recently heard that Desmond Tutu in answer to a question how he wanted to be remembered:
As someone who loved, someone who laughed, someone who cried and someone who forgave.
We also have to have the humility to admit that all to often we have to forgive ourselves.